A Good Reminder

Sorry I haven't been around... tons going on and I really haven't come to any logical conclusions as to how I feel about much of it... so I've been debating and hiating (the verb form or hiatus... I just made that up! I think...) with myself.

In the interim, however, I figured I'd better put SOMETHING up to entertain. Actually, for this link, I think "uplifted" is a better description to how I felt when I read it. Enjoy:

http://www.wkyt.com/blogs/sanctified/Living_in_the_Margin_124286624.html

Tidying Up

Sigh...

The world encroaches yet again on my imaginary playground...

I knew this day was coming, but I didn't expect it to be so soon. Early on in my schooling for counseling, I learned that I'd have to be very private about my private life. I realized  that I'd have to "fix" my blog. I just didn't expect it would be so soon. I didn't realize it would be so easy to "stumble" across it.

Someone ran a search using bare facts about me... and found it lickety-split. I'm not angry with the searcher, I would have been curious, too. I just didn't realize I'd be found so easily... even without my last name. I've removed my last name, and I'm undergoing the painstaking process of finding every instance with the girls' names and changing those. You'll find their identifiers in "Peeps"... sigh.

"P.D." hates her new name, and I don't blame her. I hate that I have to change it, that's not the name I gave her. Although part of me still feels that people are basically good and doesn't think anyone would use the information here against me... it's not my place to be so trusting. My job is to err on the side of caution in any matter that could impact my babies.

I'm wondering if I should change the name of the town I live in, or my hometown, or Deat's hometown. They're all three pretty small places.   I want to complain some more, but I have to get back at it.

Please pardon the mess while we undergo reconstruction.

A Distraction Beats Flowers... No Contest

I'm not sure how to write about this, how to handle it in the best way, but I have to try.

A blogger friend of mine's mother went into the hospital yesterday. It's easy to tell from her writing that she and her mom share a wonderful relationship... heck, I love her mother and I've only read about her. Her mom has had several health problems in the last couple years... and I could "read" the fear in my friend's "voice" in yesterday's post. I hurt for her, because I remember.

I remember what it was like to watch the physical deterioration of someone you love and feel powerless to do anything about it. I remember the second-guessing you put yourself through, only wanting the very best for this person, a person you love so much you'd trade places with in a minute because their well-being is THAT important to you. I remember the anger you feel at anyone else involved in their care because they just aren't doing ENOUGH... don't they know how important this is? I remember the LONG stretches of time in the hospital, just waiting, waiting to see what's coming... hoping upon hope it won't be the worst. 

I remember trying to read to break up the time... to try to find something, anything to be a distraction from what this hospital stay COULD mean. And I remember being unable to focus long enough to even get through first chapter of the book I bought the day of his first hospitalization... even though I tried during each of his five hospital stays. (I didn't actually read it until over a year after he died).

So, I thought to myself, what did I WANT people to do? I wanted them to distract me. I wanted them to show the customary concern for what was happening, then I wanted them to talk about ANYTHING else. Walk me to the cafeteria for a snack or some dinner. Engage me in anything that gave me a few brief minutes when I could think about something else... especially something that would make me laugh. Either that or just LISTEN to me talk about what was happening, out loud, to help me get a handle on it.

Unfortunately, that didn't happen very often. I don't BLAME anyone or feel resentment that more people didn't provide that at all, how would anyone know? I didn't know how to ASK for that, and at the time, with my mind so full of other things, it really didn't occur to me TO ask for it. Make no mistake... I had more than my share of blessings from our friends and family during Deat's illness, and I'm sure many people were afraid that coming to the hospital or calling me on my cell would be akin to intrusion during a difficult time... but it would have been welcome.

I wish I could offer my friend lunch in the cafeteria, but she's too far away. I can't do that, so I'm trying to send her simple notes with some goofy spin to try to make her smile. I don't know if it's helping, but I know she appreciates my small effort, and that means a lot to me.

 I just thought tonight, this would be a good opportunity to tell folks in case you know someone who could sure use the distraction, now, or in the near future. Don't wait for him or her to ask. Just call and offer, or just stop by the hospital... if it's not something your friend would want, he or she can let you know. But if it IS something he or she would want, I'll betcha he or she, like me, just doesn't know how to ask.

A Free E

Still reading old posts from Capricorn Cringe... (The Friggin' Cat House in my blog list) still ignoring the laundry pile. I keep thinking if I ignore it, it will suddenly go away...

Anyway, came across one where she had accidentally added an E on her cousin's name, so I thought I'd tell you my E story...

My first name was (is) Anne, with an "e". (ex: Anne Kelly Maiden) My best friend throughout childhood and beyond is Ann, with no "e". So, at some point, while I was in elementary school, I asked Daddy why my Anne had an "e" but Ann's name didn't have one.

"You want the truth?"

"Well, yes sir."

"When you were born, that nurse asked me, 'Lafayette, does this Ann(e) have an "e" on it or not? I said, 'Does it cost anything to put an "e" on there?' She said, 'no' so I said 'Well give 'er all she can have then!'"

There was an "e" on my Anne because it didn't cost extra...

When I got married, I dropped "Anne", my first name, the name I didn't use. Having a first name that I didn't use just made my mail confusing anyway.  I wanted to keep my maiden name, but I'm not into hyphens, so I made my maiden name my middle name. (Kelly Maiden Married)

A few years after we moved to L-town, Daddy had to send me something in the mail. I was surprised to see an envelope addressed in his handwriting, instead of my mother's. It was made out to Mrs. Kelley Maiden Married... with an arrow pointing to the underlined "e".

Above the arrow, was a note: FREE "E"!

Daddy just wanted to make sure, even after my marriage and name change, I still got the full benefit of my free "e". Daddy always looks out for me.

Bringing the MC into 2010(1) and Texting with Kelly

I've tried to present the Master Counselor in the best light because 1. I'm grateful for my job and 2. I genuinely like the MC.

I've told you he's OCD. I've told you he's intimidating at times... so what I've hinted at, but I haven't really come out and said is, 1. He's WAY set in his ways, 2. He can be a major grouch if things don't go the way he wants them to or the way he thinks they should, PARTICULARLY technology-related tasks. Luckily, (and in his defense) he CAN laugh at himself and he's also very self-aware and would freely admit to these flaws. (Um, I think. Yeah, he would, 'cause he really could give a rat's hind-end what you think of him.)

Anyway, the forms overhaul...  I set up headers (logos, if you will) for both the satellite office and the main practice. I also set up footers for both. The MC was smart enough to save all his forms in rich text format so they'd open anywhere... and I could easily edit them from my machine. Unfortunately, he was also running his documents out of Word '03... and Word '03 didn't feature the font I used to set up the main office logo... not to mention I didn't have a clue as to how to add the headers and footers to his header/footer template library so he wouldn't have to copy/paste everything from other documents. So I casually mentioned on Wednesday that he really should upgrade, that it would be so much better... Note CASUALLY.

This morning I came in early, and the MC had a client in his office so I had to hang out in the front office for a bit. Lee* comes in on Friday mornings to clean, so I chatted with her while I waited. She casually mentioned that he had been frustrated when he came in this morning because he bought and loaded Word 2010 and couldn't get any of his non-.rtf files to open. I started (jokingly) packing up my things.

Lee: where are you going?
Me: I'm getting out of here before he gets out of that session!
Lee: Wha?
Me: It was MY IDEA for him to upgrade!
Lee: Oh man!
Me: He will kill me. It won't be pretty.
Lee: It might not be too bad, he didn't sound too evil when he said your name earlier...

Luckily I had some time to research the problem and print out "fixes" before his session ended. And true to type, he made a beeline for me as soon as his client left. I held up my printed research like a shield. I went to his computer, opened Word 10 and opened a file... no problem.

MC: How'd you do that?
Me: Through Word
MC: I want to open them the way I've always opened them! Can't you make them do THAT?
Me: Grumble...

Unfortunately, I couldn't get the "open with" command to work... not even by browsing for Word 10. I ended up calling technical support, and spent an hour on the phone with "Steve" who had to take over the computer and spend another hour or so  fixing it.

MC: (Watching) Why can't you do that? Why did you have to let someone overseas do it? You're the guru.
Me: He's fixing the registry. I appreciate your confidence, but registry issues are above my pay grade. They make the top of my head blow clean off.

That seemed to satisfy him... but he latched on to "above my pay grade" and I suspect anything he thinks I can't do will be "above my pay grade" for the next few weeks. It's okay, I've proved him wrong before... ;-)

It's Friday night. (Well, technically it's early Saturday morning, but I wanted to get this done before... well, I'll add that at the end. I got a text from Kelly earlier:

Kelly: You up?
Me: Yes... on a date.
Kelly: Cool. I'll not interrupt.
Me: Oh, you're not. It's with 2 guys... Ben & Jerry.
Kelly: Smh...


As for why I had to get this done... well I won't be near a computer for a couple days. Why? It's in the chorus...**



*not her real name
** don't forget to turn off the player on the right!